For all my life, I grew up hearing the word God. Both used for the good and for the bad. I grew up learning about Him, learning about prayer, His plan and His son Jesus Christ. I grew up in a home where as little kids we would pray as a family and where my parents spoke of Him often. I grew up in a state and area where God, especially religion, is talked about openly and frequently. But, I don’t remember as a kid praying to God personally that much and especially as a teenager, I don’t remember saying personal prayers at all. Then when I got to High School I began to distance myself from God and started to question who He is and wondered if He even existed?
The distance between me and God all started when I was in High School when I found out I had developed a fractured lower spine and a very rare back disease that kept me from playing and trying out for the two sports I loved most; basketball and football. I became so upset, I started to distance myself from God and the very thought of Him. I became very mad at Him and I blamed Him for my injury, and I would shake my fists at the Heavens and questioned Him: ‘Why me? Why did you do this to me?What did I do wrong? You know this was my dream, how could you do this to me?’ Me questioning God and being upset with Him went on for years and I began to not even believe in God at all. As that distance grew, I made many mistakes that taught me a lot of lessons, but ultimately it was leaving me feeling alone.
Long story short, when I was 19 years old I had God back in my life. It happened at a very pivotal moment into my life. He and His son Jesus Christ came and rescued me from my dark, lonely, and depressing state that I was in. He saved me. For the first time in my life that I can remember, God became the centered piece of my life. With what I went through and the changes I made and the things I overcame, I thought I finally knew God. I wanted to start doing what He wanted me to do. I changed my whole life around, a full 360! I stopped questioning and being upset with Him and started to pray about what I should do with my life. God answered my prayers and told me to serve a mission, something I was very much opposed to my whole life. But, I decided to go and was called to serve in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania.
Read Benjmin Carraway’s full post at thewayofcarraway.blogspot.com.
