Cancellation of Sealing Question

[Finrock]

Good afternoon Utahguy1980! I hope you are having a great day. :)

This forum is useless... I didn't come here to find out that my girlfriend was selfish, ignorant, or unchrist like... The problem with the church is several members here that make assumptions and gloat their gospel knowledge. The fact that she hasn't been in the church that long doesn't mean she is selfish it means that she is still learning. Line upon line, precept upon precept. Shame on all of you that have made that assumption.

I can definitely understand how you are feeling. It isn't pleasant to have someone attribute negative things to a loved one or spouse.

I think the bottom line here is that there is a misunderstanding on your spouses part about the Sealing (and based on many of the posts on this thread she isn't alone) and somehow you'll need to find a way to help her understand that there is no risk of her having to "share" you in the afterlife with your ex-wife. Her marriage and sealing to you will be special and one-of-a-kind! I hope that you will find a way to get this all sorted out with her. I pray for the Spirit to be with you so that you both can be edified and grow together as you work to resolve this concern.

Kind Regards,

Finrock

[Just_A_Guy]

Given the circumstances, I really couldn't resist proving Just_A_Guy's accusation that I'm "something of a Church Handbook junkie."

FWIW, it was an admiring "accusation". :)

[rameumptom]

Page xiii of Book 1 outlines the distribution of Book 1. Specifically, four copies are distributed to bishoprics, and five copies are distributed to stake presidents. They are permitted to distribute the book among themselves as they see fit. I know of some wards where the bishop, clerk, and executive secretary carry a copy and the two counselors share the fourth. In my current ward, the bishop, counselors, and executive secretary carry a copy. I have a pdf I carry on a flash drive. I don't feel particularly bad about this seeing as 1) Book 1 is scheduled to be uploaded onto the Leader Resources for Stake Presidents, Bishops, and Clerks of the beta.lds.org site, and 2) my stake clerk gave me the pdf so that I could easily access the book at work and at home.

However, I'll stand behind everything else you just said. :)

MoE, There will be a couple of big guys coming by your home to inspect your computer, all flash drives, external hard drives, your underwear drawer, and to take your fingerprints (not a copy, the ACTUAL fingerprints). Don't try to run, as they have been known to hunt people down and feed them slowly to their pet reptiles.

It's been nice to know you. And let this be an example to everyone else not to have copies of Book 1 when they are not authorized to have it!

[MarginOfError]

MoE, There will be a couple of big guys coming by your home to inspect your computer, all flash drives, external hard drives, your underwear drawer, and to take your fingerprints (not a copy, the ACTUAL fingerprints). Don't try to run, as they have been known to hunt people down and feed them slowly to their pet reptiles.

It's been nice to know you. And let this be an example to everyone else not to have copies of Book 1 when they are not authorized to have it!

No sir! not me! I'm more evasive than Pam's gingerbread man!

[MobyMule]

No sir! not me! I'm more evasive than Pam's gingerbread man!

[aharon]

Mart is right, I do stand corrected!

I felt pretty confident that I was right, considering I had two friends who told me they had to cancel their sealings before they could remarry. (Both guys). So I was going off of that. It also seems to make sense, but

Apparantly, the manuel tells otherwise.

So yeah, sorry utah for being so confident in my response, I agree with sitting down with your girlfriend, and the bishop and talk about it. Bishops are really sensitive to the spirit and he will be able to help and the lords will in the matter will be made known.

Good luck my friend and I am praying for you.

[Utahguy1980]

Well I'm sitting in the Airport getting ready to fly to New Zealand... going to give this relationship one last shot. Pray that she will have her heart softened. Thanks everyone.

[Guest mirancs8]

Well I'm sitting in the Airport getting ready to fly to New Zealand... going to give this relationship one last shot. Pray that she will have her heart softened. Thanks everyone.

Praying for you both.

[aharon]

Hang in there! God is in charge and knows whats best. Probably not what you want to hear, but it is true.

[Utahguy1980]

i keep reminding myself I chose this free agency plan... sometimes wonder what I was thinking! lol

[MobyMule]

Well I'm sitting in the Airport getting ready to fly to New Zealand... going to give this relationship one last shot. Pray that she will have her heart softened. Thanks everyone.

May the Lord bless you.

[Roseslipper]

hey stop fighting and aruging about whos right or wrong...

[Maureen]

hey stop fighting and aruging about whos right or wrong...

Your comments are a little late.

M.

[matsta76]

Hi there,

I am need of some help regarding a similar type of question as this one. I have recently applied for a cancellation of my sealing to my ex wife. I am married for the second time to a recent convert and we have quite a few questions regarding eternal marriage as we understand it. Even though my bishop assured me that I could get it cancelled,m I have now been told that men can't get a sealing cancelled, that we can be sealed to multiple women and that we just get a clearance. I am not asking this because we are yet desperate to get sealed to each other, its more about being free from my first sealing. I will not bore you all with the details, I just need to get answers. I want to know that I am not bound to a life (Eternal Marriage) with my ex wife, that the civil divorce is enough to free me from her and that I wont be bound to her. My Stake president, Bishop and Temple president have all assured me that I wont be, yet I cannot find any written evidence on this subject. My Wife now whom i love and adore is a very inquisative and evidence based person, it took her a good 8 months to join hte church (which she did before we even met) because she wants to know what she is getting herself into and I am also like this. I married my first wife in the temple because I was told and taught that marriage is eternal, I didn't really understand what I was getting into, and truth betold my ex wife and I didn't really know each other well enough (It is hard to know someone if you don't live with them first, in my opinion). I have been assured by my leaders, yet know one can show me anything in writing. I have researched the sealing and all the prophets of old talk about sealing as eternal marriage, that the sealing ceremony is infact an eternal marriage ceremony. No where does it say that I can find or anyone show me that a sealing clearance frees me from my first one. I couldnot imagine living an eternal life with a women whom I have chosen not to be married to in this life, yet as I understand eternal marriage and the sealing is all intertwined I will have to be with her in the next, it doesn't ring true. Surely the brethren have addressed this. I do believe in the sealing ordinance is very important and sacred, I am civilally divorced, I just want to see that I am not going to be bound to her, and unfortunately when people say that God will sought it all out? What happens if the soughting out is that I ma bound to someone because of a decision I made when I was young was the wrong decision. It is called the plan of happiness, surely i will not be bound to a life of misery. This is how my wife and I see it and no body has been able to show us any different. I understand that if my ex choses to marry someone different in the temple she can ask for a cancellation and that will free me from her, but the truth is I can't ever see her marrying again because of the person she is and the reputation she has, she is not active and doesn't really believe in the church anymore. I just need reassurance for me and my wife that we will not be bound to someone because of the sealing that took place years ago.

[Lisa-marie]

read, acknowledged wish I could help but have no idea.

[FunkyTown]

Nobody is forced to be together in the eternities. Ever.

Hi there,

I am need of some help regarding a similar type of question as this one. I have recently applied for a cancellation of my sealing to my ex wife. I am married for the second time to a recent convert and we have quite a few questions regarding eternal marriage as we understand it. Even though my bishop assured me that I could get it cancelled,m I have now been told that men can't get a sealing cancelled, that we can be sealed to multiple women and that we just get a clearance. I am not asking this because we are yet desperate to get sealed to each other, its more about being free from my first sealing. I will not bore you all with the details, I just need to get answers. I want to know that I am not bound to a life (Eternal Marriage) with my ex wife, that the civil divorce is enough to free me from her and that I wont be bound to her. My Stake president, Bishop and Temple president have all assured me that I wont be, yet I cannot find any written evidence on this subject. My Wife now whom i love and adore is a very inquisative and evidence based person, it took her a good 8 months to join hte church (which she did before we even met) because she wants to know what she is getting herself into and I am also like this. I married my first wife in the temple because I was told and taught that marriage is eternal, I didn't really understand what I was getting into, and truth betold my ex wife and I didn't really know each other well enough (It is hard to know someone if you don't live with them first, in my opinion). I have been assured by my leaders, yet know one can show me anything in writing. I have researched the sealing and all the prophets of old talk about sealing as eternal marriage, that the sealing ceremony is infact an eternal marriage ceremony. No where does it say that I can find or anyone show me that a sealing clearance frees me from my first one. I couldnot imagine living an eternal life with a women whom I have chosen not to be married to in this life, yet as I understand eternal marriage and the sealing is all intertwined I will have to be with her in the next, it doesn't ring true. Surely the brethren have addressed this. I do believe in the sealing ordinance is very important and sacred, I am civilally divorced, I just want to see that I am not going to be bound to her, and unfortunately when people say that God will sought it all out? What happens if the soughting out is that I ma bound to someone because of a decision I made when I was young was the wrong decision. It is called the plan of happiness, surely i will not be bound to a life of misery. This is how my wife and I see it and no body has been able to show us any different. I understand that if my ex choses to marry someone different in the temple she can ask for a cancellation and that will free me from her, but the truth is I can't ever see her marrying again because of the person she is and the reputation she has, she is not active and doesn't really believe in the church anymore. I just need reassurance for me and my wife that we will not be bound to someone because of the sealing that took place years ago.

[MarginOfError]

You will not be granted a sealing cancellation because that would also cancel your wife's sealing. Part of the sealing ordinance includes a personal covenant made by the individual, and although that covenant may be broken now, there still needs to be room for repentance for your ex-wife. Sealing cancellations are usually only granted when the woman is pursuing another sealing, which allows her to receive the covenant again.

And then cometh the judgment of the Holy One upon them...; and he that is righteous shall be righteous still; he that is happy shall be happy still....

No one who makes righteous choices in this life will be forced to an eternity of unhappiness, or even less happiness. Especially based on temporal administrative policy.

[Gwen]

I want to know that I am not bound to a life (Eternal Marriage) with my ex wife, that the civil divorce is enough to free me from her and that I wont be bound to her. My Stake president, Bishop and Temple president have all assured me that I wont be, yet I cannot find any written evidence on this subject.

think outside of the box when doing research. don't look just at what is written specifically on sealing cancellation and clearance. look at the basic principles everything is founded upon. the "written evidence" is there. also have to pray and feel this out.

things like.... (not exact quotes, don't have time to look it all up)

"when you do what i ask i am bound but when you do not what i ask you have no promise"... divorce is not living the covenant therefore you have no eternal promise.

"if you can't live the lower law you will not be asked to live a higher law" this one is often in reference to the law of tithing and consecration. but it is just as applicable. the lower law being this civil marriage on earth. if you can't live that (divorce is an obvious sign you can't) then you won't be asked to live the higher law, eternal marriage.

you may also be able to find many places where it's been taught that a sealing isn't an eternal marriage. it's the hope and promise of the opportunity of an eternal marriage. you have to live righteously. you have to live your covenant. you have to treat each other righteously. by default divorce would dissolve that. however you don't have to divorce to lose the fulfillment of the sealing promise. if the marriage was full of unrighteous dominion and abuse that is not a celestial marriage, the covenant is broken, you have no promise.

[ttr1023]

Well I'm sitting in the Airport getting ready to fly to New Zealand... going to give this relationship one last shot. Pray that she will have her heart softened. Thanks everyone.

How did everything work out after you went to New Zealand? You started this thread three years ago. I'm just curious how things turned out.

[ttr1023]

think outside of the box when doing research. don't look just at what is written specifically on sealing cancellation and clearance. look at the basic principles everything is founded upon. the "written evidence" is there. also have to pray and feel this out.

things like.... (not exact quotes, don't have time to look it all up)

"when you do what i ask i am bound but when you do not what i ask you have no promise"... divorce is not living the covenant therefore you have no eternal promise.

"if you can't live the lower law you will not be asked to live a higher law" this one is often in reference to the law of tithing and consecration. but it is just as applicable. the lower law being this civil marriage on earth. if you can't live that (divorce is an obvious sign you can't) then you won't be asked to live the higher law, eternal marriage.

you may also be able to find many places where it's been taught that a sealing isn't an eternal marriage. it's the hope and promise of the opportunity of an eternal marriage. you have to live righteously. you have to live your covenant. you have to treat each other righteously. by default divorce would dissolve that. however you don't have to divorce to lose the fulfillment of the sealing promise. if the marriage was full of unrighteous dominion and abuse that is not a celestial marriage, the covenant is broken, you have no promise.

Very well put Gwen. It's like people think of getting sealed much like some of mainstream christianity thinks of accepting jesus and being saved. As if it's "Well, that's done, bound, and taken care of forever no matter what I do, because I "accepted christ/got sealed". It's ALL about our actions and deeds once the ordinance has been made, and now you have to live it. It boggles my mind how people think we won't have our agency or that we'll be damned and stuck with someone you were sealed to in a previous marriage but only had a clearance done with, yet you're trudging through the highest degree of glory, miserable because you're sealed to two people, one who you used to be married to, and there's this eternal elephant in the room causing all sorts of discord because you're sealed to two women at the same time for ever and ever. Ha... yah, cuz that's how it is...