The Overprotected Kid

[Guest]

This is a long read but very well worth it. There are lots of good nuggets here. Well, at least, it's some kind of validation for my "loose" parenting method that my peers keep on telling me is tantamount to child abuse. They couldn't believe I would let my 2 boys age 10 and 12 go to the theater on their own. They give me stern warning when they see my 2 boys biking around the the far side of the neighborhood (2 miles away from my house). They give me talks when they see my kids hanging off the top of a 50-foot pine or going knee-deep in algae in the pond...

But, I'm guilty of overprotection too... it was a battle at the house when they would come home with frogs, lizards, snakes, and all manners of insects in all forms of containers. "The disease these things could bring... how do you know they're not venomous..." etc. etc... But, I did balance it with allowing them to raise all manners of pets from reputable pet breeders in our home. So my house is a zoo. And I got really upset when the boys and their friends (all boys as well) went to the movies with 2 girls and I never got a single phone call from these girls' parents...

Anyway, I got wind of this from a snippet of Rush Limbaugh today on my way to pick up the kids from their latest adventure...

The Overprotected Kid - The Atlantic

Your thoughts?

[NeuroTypical]

Love it.

[Backroads]

I think it's fantastic.  I do tend to a be a cautious worrywart--until I compare myself with some of the worries out there.

 

I think every kid ought to break a bone during childhood. 

 

I worry about the rising population of young adults who can't fend for themselves because pop psychologists tell us a good way to build a teenager's independence is to let them pick their own outfits or pick a board game for family night.

[Guest]

They're 10 and 12 now, which I agree is an appropriate age for more freedom, but how long have they been allowed to do those things?

 

There's a family that lived in our neighborhood who would allow their very young kids (like 4, 6, and 7 years old) to walk a couple of miles to the park. The toddler would play in the front yard by herself, and was frequently found wandering into the street and around the corner by herself. We were all terrified when they decided to move the next town over, because the mothers in the neighborhood knew to watch out for these kids; but what would happen to them in a new town?

 

So yes, there is overprotection. But there is underprotection, too, and the fact is, we live in a world that is much less secure than the one we grew up in.

[Backroads]

They're 10 and 12 now, which I agree is an appropriate age for more freedom, but how long have they been allowed to do those things?

 

There's a family that lived in our neighborhood who would allow their very young kids (like 4, 6, and 7 years old) to walk a couple of miles to the park. The toddler would play in the front yard by herself, and was frequently found wandering into the street and around the corner by herself. We were all terrified when they decided to move the next town over, because the mothers in the neighborhood knew to watch out for these kids; but what would happen to them in a new town?

 

So yes, there is overprotection. But there is underprotection, too, and the fact is, we live in a world that is much less secure than the one we grew up in.

 

 

I recall running around with other 7 year olds in a radius of several miles... but I would say 4 is much too young. 

 

I'm not strictly against those parents' policy, but so much has to be taken into consideration... one place might be fun, but that doesn't mean another place is.

[paulsifer42]

When I read it I thought of trying to find some kind of balance, and being smart about when a good age is for more freedom.  My daughter is only 3 right now, so I pretty much just helicoptor, but I don't want to do that to her forever, nor do I want to be an absentee parent.  Just has me thinking.