Mission


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How would you help someone become more excited to go on a mission, especially when it sounds more terrifying to a prospective missionary than exciting? How excited or sure that they should go on a mission, should they be before they go out? 

 

What about faith and belief? How much faith or belief should they have? Willing to say "I believe" but not "I know"?

 

Let's assume for a moment, that they plan on going on a mission, and would willingly go regardless, but need to prepare a little before hand.

 

This is not a hypothetical question, any advice?

 

Edit:They have shown an interest in possibly going

Edited by Crypto
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I think that for most people, not just missionaries, when they say "I know" what they mean is "I believe". Not all clearly, but many. I think belief is a perfectly reasonable and acceptable reason to serve a mission.

I also think that sharing honest mission experiences with youth is valuable, but it is important to share both the fun experiences and the difficult ones. Having an accurate picture is much more beneficial than just repeating "it was the best two years" mantra.

Finally, I m convinced that missions are not for everyone. If an individual does not want to go they should neither be forced, guilted, or bribed into doing so.

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If you have desires to serve you are called to the work. But such desire, coupled with belief, are only a starting point. You must learn to cast out your doubts and fears. Faith and fear cannot exist in the same person at the same time for if we have fear we cannot exercise faith and if we have faith we will not have fear. The two are contradictory. This of course does not mean that you will be forever free from questions and doubts but you can be sure of your direction at certain times and moments in your life. 

 

Elder Anderson shared an important insight about faith. Once when he was giving a blessing he felt to speak words he had at that point never considered in such a way, he said, "The impression that came to me was: Faith is not only a feeling; it is a decision. He would need to choose faith" ("You Know Enough", Ensign, October 2008). You must do the same. 

 

Obtain the word of the Lord. By this I do not simply mean to study the BoM or the Bible, but to gain the spirit of the Lord and his word in your own heart. Come in humility before the Lord, ponder his word, and seek to find the truth. When He speaks to you of the truth and what you must do the voices of the world will drift into insignificance. Then you will know and will not need another person to tell you.

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How would you help someone become more excited to go on a mission, especially when it sounds more terrifying to a prospective missionary than exciting? How excited or sure that they should go on a mission, should they be before they go out? 

 

What about faith and belief? How much faith or belief should they have? Willing to say "I believe" but not "I know"?

 

Let's assume for a moment, that they plan on going on a mission, and would willingly go regardless, but need to prepare a little before hand.

 

This is not a hypothetical question, any advice?

Here are a few ideas:

  • Live the commandments. This is a sine qua non of missionary preparation.

  • Be deeply involved in the Church and its activities. Don't merely attend Church; really serve in your callings, and really work to build fellowship with your fellow Saints.
  • Read and pay attention to the scriptures, especially the Book of Mormon but also the other scriptures.
  • Nurture your own testimony. Take Alma 32 to heart. There is no shame in saying "I believe"; we all must start there. But don't be content just to believe. Nurture that belief until it becomes strong and bears fruit.
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Finally, I m convinced that missions are not for everyone. If an individual does not want to go they should neither be forced, guilted, or bribed into doing so.

 

 

While I agree with force or bribed or guilted...  However they should be reminded that it is priesthood duty commanded of all young men.  And to many will take that as being forced, or guilted and I do not agree with that assessment

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Elder Anderson shared an important insight about faith. Once when he was giving a blessing he felt to speak words he had at that point never considered in such a way, he said, "The impression that came to me was: Faith is not only a feeling; it is a decision. He would need to choose faith" ("You Know Enough", Ensign, October 2008). You must do the same. 

 

I would certainly agree.  I think God is interested far more in what we choose than in what we believe.  That mild shift in emphasis allowed me to return to the Church, and as I recall it's an important theme in one of the Givens' latest books.

 

If I can trust the Internet, Ben Jonson said, "Language most shows a man, speak that I may see thee."  Close, but no cigar.  I think it's really, "Choice most shows a man, choose that I may see thee."

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Estradling,

I understand what you are saying, and yes we have heard over the pulpit that "every worthy young man should serve a mission." However we also know that there are numerous young men that have been "excused" from service for a variety of physical issues and ailments. There are some that due to emotional or mental issues should also not serve.

Sugar casting what a mission experience is further sets these youn men and young women up for further damage. We need to be honest in what a mission is, it is a pressure cooker. A wonderful experience for most and long term damaging for a few. Those few are real people, with real lives, and sacrificing them on the altar of a nice phrase is NOT ok.

I loved my mission and have no regrets. However, it was not the best two years of my life, nor should it be for anyone. But I will restate and stand behind what I said above...a mission is not for everyone. If the young man or young woman in question does not feel they should be there then leadership, family, and ward friends need to accept that. Perhaps if you had a companion that attempted suicide 3 times in your presence, it would shape your opinion slightly differently. If it was your son or daughter perhaps even more so.

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Estradling,

I understand what you are saying, and yes we have heard over the pulpit that "every worthy young man should serve a mission." However we also know that there are numerous young men that have been "excused" from service for a variety of physical issues and ailments. There are some that due to emotional or mental issues should also not serve.

Sugar casting what a mission experience is further sets these youn men and young women up for further damage. We need to be honest in what a mission is, it is a pressure cooker. A wonderful experience for most and long term damaging for a few. Those few are real people, with real lives, and sacrificing them on the altar of a nice phrase is NOT ok.

I loved my mission and have no regrets. However, it was not the best two years of my life, nor should it be for anyone. But I will restate and stand behind what I said above...a mission is not for everyone. If the young man or young woman in question does not feel they should be there then leadership, family, and ward friends need to accept that. Perhaps if you had a companion that attempted suicide 3 times in your presence, it would shape your opinion slightly differently. If it was your son or daughter perhaps even more so.

 

I think we mostly agree.

 

The Scripture clearly teach that the whole point of this life is to "See if we will do all things the Lord Command."  The Lord through his Prophets have made it very clear that "a Young man is commanded to prepare for and serve a full time mission."

 

Are there exceptions?  Yes the D&C has a very clear one.  It is they strive to fulfill the command but they are stopped by forces outside of their control.  Medical/mental issues can easily fall into this category.  Others can as well.  There is also the possibility that their mission might be less then traditional, which can be discovered through personal prayer and study (if it exist)

 

The potential missionary of course has their agency and should be allowed to choose their path. (God allows them to choose not to follow him, we should respect God's wisdom in that)  The conflict comes in when we as parents and leaders are trying to make sure the potential missionary understands the ramifications of the choice they are about to make.  That is clearly their stewardship and responsibility.

 

That is a hard balance to hold.  Some parents/leaders might over reach and try to make the choice for them.  That is wrong.  Some might under play it leaving the potential missionary without the proper understanding. this is also wrong.

 

Then each individual potential missionary does respond differently.  Some can be hard to reach with anything short of a sledgehammer.  Other even the lightest of whispers brings protest of control and dominion.  Because of this a simple one size fits all approach (either way) does not work.

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As estradling said, I think I'm mostly in agreement with RMGuy's post. My disagreement is not primarily of substance -- I suspect RMGuy and I are close, if not identical, in our underlying beliefs -- but of expression and perspective. Here is mine.

 

Every young LDS man should prepare to serve a full-time mission. He should be morally clean, worthy to hold the Priesthood, know the basic gospel precepts, and be willing and able to teach them.

 

Some young men, through absolutely no fault of their own, can't do this. These young men are given other positions in which to serve, or at times are "honorably excused" from their full-time missionary duties. There should be no shame at all in this, and it's sad (and truly shameful to the rest of us) if there is.

 

Other young men make decisions that preclude them from fulfilling this Priesthood duty, such as fornication resulting in pregnancy. These young men have lost the opportunity to fulfill this duty, and as a result have lost the blessings that come from obedience. But repentance is still as open to them as it is to the rest of us. Their poor choice does not doom them forever, unless they refuse to cleanse themselves in the atoning blood of Christ. In this sense, such young men are in exactly the same position as each of the rest of us. The difference is, they are no longer able to discharge this Priesthood duty of full-time missionary service. But that doesn't mean full-time missionary service is not a duty; it is. It's just one they can no longer attain to.

 

You might do something stupid that costs you your leg. You might then repent of having done something so stupid, at which point you're on the same plane of wisdom as those who didn't do the stupid thing to begin with. But that doesn't mean your leg magically regrows. It does not.

 

Maybe your buddy did the same stupid thing as you, but he still has all his limbs -- plus, he learned the lesson by watching you lose your leg. How is that fair? Answer: Fairness has nothing to do with it. You did something stupid and lost your leg. We're all sorry about that. We don't think you're an evil person for losing your leg to some stupid teenage stunt. We don't refuse to associate with you. But the leg is gone, and that's not gonna change.

 

I have long pondered on the difference between two young women who fornicate, only one of whom gets pregnant. Both have committed exactly the same sin, yet the unpregnant one seems to have gotten off so much more easily. How is this fair? Same with two young men who fornicate, but only one of whom impregnates his girlfriend. Why can the one serve a mission and not the other? It seems so unfair! But it's not a matter of fairness; it's a matter of accepting responsibility and of avoiding sin.

 

I just discovered that an old mission AP whom I knew died a few years back. I hadn't known. The guy was one of the best young men I had ever known, an example to all in his diligence. He did everything right, lived an apparently ideal life -- yet died before the age of 50, leaving a widow and five orphaned children. How is that fair?

 

It's not a matter of fair. It's a matter of do what you're supposed to do. And if you don't, accept the consequences and move on with your life. But don't take your weaknesses or failures as an excuse to tell others they don't have to worry about such things. They do.

 

It is in fact the duty of ALL LDS young men to prepare to serve a full-time mission. Some will not be able to, for reasons beyond their control. Others will not be able to because of choices they make. Still others will not be able to, and we really can't tell whether it's because of their choices or because of things beyond their control. So we withhold final judgment and try to love all men. BUT IT'S STILL THE DUTY OF EVERY LDS YOUNG MAN TO PREPARE TO SERVE A FULL-TIME MISSION.

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What are they terrified of? Do they suffer from anxiety? Depression? Club foot? Cleft lip? We need some more details on why this person feels the way they do. Going from 'Terrified' to 'Yay' is a bit of a step.

Maybe terrified was a poor choice in words, unappealing might be better. Stemming from introversion more than anything else?

 

They seem fine, no physical, mental, or social troubles. They aren't being forced or guilted as far as I can tell, and they would be older than the average missionary (so most of the ward members already seem to have given up trying to guilt them into doing it, which is a good thing imo).

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Maybe terrified was a poor choice in words, unappealing might be better. Stemming from introversion more than anything else?

 

They seem fine, no physical, mental, or social troubles. They aren't being forced or guilted as far as I can tell, and they would be older than the average missionary (so most of the ward members already seem to have given up trying to guilt them into doing it, which is a good thing imo).

My bias is always going to lean toward doing your duty of missionary service. But you know what I say about my opinion and a dollar.

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Every young man "Should" prepare to go on a mission. The mission is not for everyone, and I think that Vort outlined some excellent reason as to why a young man may not be eligible to go, or may do an alternative type of mission if he is worthy and has the desire.

 

Belief is enough, this should in time with dedicated study and prayer turn into a testimony of the gospel.

 

A mission is not easy. Let no one tell you any different, I found that during my mission the struggles made me stronger. These are the things that helped me find and grow roots in the Gospel of Jesus Christ. There is more to the mission than just preaching the gospel you are being prepared for life. This is an invaluable experience that cannot be replaced by formal education.

 

I firmly believe that the decision should be up to the individual and that we should not preach damnation or chastise him for not fulfilling his priesthood duties. I have discovered that everyone runs at their own pace when it comes to the gospel, and some barely make it past a crawl.

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I firmly believe that the decision should be up to the individual and that we should not preach damnation or chastise him for not fulfilling his priesthood duties.

I agree with the words you write above. But based on previous conversations, I have some doubts, so I want to make sure we're speaking the same language.

 

When you say "the decision should be up to the individual": What do you mean by that? For example, who else would make such a decision for a young man? I see your statement here as true but trivially obvious; no one else is in a position to make his decisions for him.

 

When you say "we should not preach damnation...for not fulfilling his priesthood duties": Under what circumstances might we be justified in "preaching damnation" to someone? Or is it that you have seen people "preach damnation" to a young man who didn't serve a mission? Or is this simply hyperbole?

 

When you say that we should not "chastise him": Again, under what circumstances might we want to "chastise him"? I'm almost 52, and I do not recall ever having chastised anyone in my ward for having failed to perform his Priesthood service (except possibly my sons). I have occasionally done so in online forums such as this one, but in the position of someone engaged in discussion and debate, not as one holding any actual authority to admonish another.

 
Is it the case that some areas of the Church just have lots and lots of members waiting to pile on any LDS young man who doesn't serve a mission?

 

In short, what you write seems obviously true, but no more relevant than saying, "We shouldn't slice open and gut people for not serving missions." Unless I'm missing something, which is entirely possible.

 

Final thought: Are you suggesting that, in discussions at Church and on this forum, we should avoid making statements such as "It is the duty of every young man to prepare himself to serve a full-time mission"? If so, what is your rationale for counseling against speaking the truth, in fact the selfsame truth that the prophets themselves have taught?

 

I am too often combative, and even when I'm not, I too often come across that way. In this case, I am not trying to be combative; my questions are sincere.

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Is it the case that some areas of the Church just have lots and lots of members waiting to pile on any LDS young man who doesn't serve a mission?

 

Um, yes, but the mechanisms of action aren't forthright and generally passive aggressive. Things such as social shunning, not extending callings or home teaching families, not being asked to give prayers or talks, gossip, snide comments etc. 

Maybe not always lots and lots and lots, but I've seen it happen to a few. I could go into examples of horror stories, but that would discount the majority of good people who don't do these things. It happens enough though to occasionally be a problem.

 

Also, lets not drift too far from the threads intent? Your comments about who should and shouldn't go are still relavent, but could quickly spiral away.

 

 

How would you help someone become more excited to go on a mission.
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How would you help someone become more excited to go on a mission, especially when it sounds more terrifying to a prospective missionary than exciting? How excited or sure that they should go on a mission, should they be before they go out? 

 

What about faith and belief? How much faith or belief should they have? Willing to say "I believe" but not "I know"?

 

Let's assume for a moment, that they plan on going on a mission, and would willingly go regardless, but need to prepare a little before hand.

 

This is not a hypothetical question, any advice?

 

Edit:They have shown an interest in possibly going

 

When it comes to getting someone excited to go on a mission, I recommend spending as much time as possible with the full time missionaries, doing real missionary work. Hopefully, with time, luck, prayer and hardwork, the person you are inquiring about will get to be involved in preparing someone for baptism. Being involved in that kind of miracle should do a lot to increase their interest in serving. 

 

I think for now, I believe should be enough. Hopefully, after not to long, that should change to I know. The sooner that happens, the more likely it is that they will be a powerful and effective missionary.

 

As for preparation, see my first point. Same advice applies. 

 

Good luck. I have seen with my own eyes how a somewhat less than enthusiastic young man served a mission and came back with a much stronger testimony than what they had when they left.

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I agree with the words you write above. But based on previous conversations, I have some doubts, so I want to make sure we're speaking the same language.

 

When you say "the decision should be up to the individual": What do you mean by that? For example, who else would make such a decision for a young man? I see your statement here as true but trivially obvious; no one else is in a position to make his decisions for him.

 

When you say "we should not preach damnation...for not fulfilling his priesthood duties": Under what circumstances might we be justified in "preaching damnation" to someone? Or is it that you have seen people "preach damnation" to a young man who didn't serve a mission? Or is this simply hyperbole?

 

When you say that we should not "chastise him": Again, under what circumstances might we want to "chastise him"? I'm almost 52, and I do not recall ever having chastised anyone in my ward for having failed to perform his Priesthood service (except possibly my sons). I have occasionally done so in online forums such as this one, but in the position of someone engaged in discussion and debate, not as one holding any actual authority to admonish another.

 
Is it the case that some areas of the Church just have lots and lots of members waiting to pile on any LDS young man who doesn't serve a mission?

 

In short, what you write seems obviously true, but no more relevant than saying, "We shouldn't slice open and gut people for not serving missions." Unless I'm missing something, which is entirely possible.

 

Final thought: Are you suggesting that, in discussions at Church and on this forum, we should avoid making statements such as "It is the duty of every young man to prepare himself to serve a full-time mission"? If so, what is your rationale for counseling against speaking the truth, in fact the selfsame truth that the prophets themselves have taught?

 

I am too often combative, and even when I'm not, I too often come across that way. In this case, I am not trying to be combative; my questions are sincere.

To clarify, only the individual can choose to serve or not. As parents and leaders we need to be cautious about this because the pressures and expectations that we place on our children do influence them. In this case a good and positive influence, however when a young man declares that he has desires to serve those outlaying pressures should not be the reason that he answers in the affirmative. I personally know of YM who went because of social/family pressure not because of a true desire to serve. No one is in a position to "make" those decisions for the YM, but lets remember that they are 18. My hope would be that in interviews with the bishop and stake president that those concerns would be resolved.

 

If a YM chooses not to serve he knows that he at that point and time that he has not fulfilled his priesthood duties because those who are BIC are taught about the importance of serving a mission from their youth. There may be a variety of reasons for not serving including a lack of faith/mental/social issues/worthiness issues. So the question becomes how do we treat this individual when they do not serve? Do we want to encourage them and keep them in the fold? Yes I think that we do. They need the time and opportunity to "get right" with their duties.  

 

My hyperbole is just that, trying to emphasize a point.

 

Do members sit in judgement? yes quite often, and these YM are painfully aware of it.

 

I wonder what the activity rate is for YM who do not serve? I suspect low but I have nothing to back this up. Lets assume low. If so this needs to be addressed.

 

On this forum there is nothing wrong with stating "It is the duty of every young man to serve" It has been stated as such by our leaders and is written out in our handbooks. In discussions at church if during the course of a lesson/talk nothing wrong with it. Those who have failed in their duties know who they are.

 

Finally yes there is always a time and place to call someone to repentance and chastise them. I would exercise caution and not overstep my authority and circle for whom I presume to receive revelation for. I recently participated in a training given by an area 70 to the local leaders. He let the hammer drop, and to be honest I thought it was great. It should be noted that he knew his audience, and acted under the mantel of his priesthood authority in doing so.

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