Lds Civil Wedding Ceremonies Are Lame.


Jason
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My wife's cousin was married this past weekend in Boise. She's LDS, he's Other. They were married in this cute little white Episcopal Church behind BSU's Stadium. They had an LDS Bishop perform the ceremony, and I have to say, that was the worst ceremony I've ever seen. Not only were they prohibited from decorating the chapel (per lds rules) but the actual ceremony was awful.

This Bishop did not include the ring ceremony during the ceremony, he let them exchange rings when he was done. Nor did he introduce the newly wedded couple as "Mr and Mrs _____."

I took a jab at the Bishop during the luncheon. I said: "Great ceremony, almost like a real Priest." Not as a slam about his authority, but about his performance.

What is it about Mormonism that mandates civil ceremonies should stink? Is someone afraid that people will discover just as much beauty or more in a non-temple wedding as they do a temple wedding? And in case someone retorts they don't have to stink, I here provide you with the CHI on the matter:

*Edited due to copyright*

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I've always understood those "rules" to apply to the chapel in an LDS building. Not sure why they couldn't decorate etc at the other chapel.

*edited due to deletion of copyrighted material in OP*

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I've always understood those "rules" to apply to the chapel in an LDS building. Not sure why they couldn't decorate etc at the other chapel.

Maybe it was just that particular Bishop's wishes. :dontknow:

I dunno. I guess I'm being a bit harsh on the whole thing, but both my wife and I were stunned at how bad it was. They would have been better off having Elvis to the ceremony in Vegas.

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My wedding was awesome, it was in the reliefe society room at my church,a nd the relief society decorated for us, it was definitely amazing,

my wife is catholic and I am LDS, we did it in my church and by my bishop. he did the ring ceremony and the introduction, as well as gave us coincil on oru marriage (which he transcribed and gave us a copy, it;s on our fridge now)

I would have not traded our wedding for anything. the only restrictions there were to the wedding was no filming or takign pictures during the actual ceremony itself, but everything was fine, you coudl also aduio-record the ceremony if you like, but no video taping or pictures. Which is understandable.

The relief society gave us an amazing reception, with music and decorations and everything.

My wedding was awesome and it was done in a LDS church by my LDS Bishop. i;m sorry if someone had a bad experience, but there are no regulations against decorations (except in the chapel) but in the chapel you can have a table with flowers and pictures and things of that nature, just no streamers, blaoons and stuff like that.

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My wedding was awesome, it was in the reliefe society room at my church,a nd the relief society decorated for us, it was definitely amazing,

my wife is catholic and I am LDS, we did it in my church and by my bishop. he did the ring ceremony and the introduction, as well as gave us coincil on oru marriage (which he transcribed and gave us a copy, it;s on our fridge now)

I would have not traded our wedding for anything. the only restrictions there were to the wedding was no filming or takign pictures during the actual ceremony itself, but everything was fine, you coudl also aduio-record the ceremony if you like, but no video taping or pictures. Which is understandable.

The relief society gave us an amazing reception, with music and decorations and everything.

My wedding was awesome and it was done in a LDS church by my LDS Bishop. i;m sorry if someone had a bad experience, but there are no regulations against decorations (except in the chapel) but in the chapel you can have a table with flowers and pictures and things of that nature, just no streamers, blaoons and stuff like that.

There you go Jason. Like you said...perhaps it was just that Bishops' preference or maybe his interpretation of the "rules." Or maybe the couple wanted it that way.

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My wedding was awesome, it was in the reliefe society room at my church,a nd the relief society decorated for us, it was definitely amazing,

my wife is catholic and I am LDS, we did it in my church and by my bishop. he did the ring ceremony and the introduction, as well as gave us coincil on oru marriage (which he transcribed and gave us a copy, it;s on our fridge now)

I would have not traded our wedding for anything. the only restrictions there were to the wedding was no filming or takign pictures during the actual ceremony itself, but everything was fine, you coudl also aduio-record the ceremony if you like, but no video taping or pictures. Which is understandable.

The relief society gave us an amazing reception, with music and decorations and everything.

My wedding was awesome and it was done in a LDS church by my LDS Bishop. i;m sorry if someone had a bad experience, but there are no regulations against decorations (except in the chapel) but in the chapel you can have a table with flowers and pictures and things of that nature, just no streamers, blaoons and stuff like that.

I'd like to correct that. Thankfully, we have to have civil weddings in England. We had decorations in the chapel which was decorated from floor to ceiling! Practically the entire ward turned up to help us decorate it the night before. We had streamers, flowers, and ribbons on the end of each aisle, and on the pulpit plus a huge floral display. We had confetti and rose petals on the floor-It was like heaven! We had absolutely no restrictions atall. And the cultural hall was even better-it looked amazing I couldnt have been happier. Why did you have your wedding in the relief society room???

I think that what Jason says is more of an American thing. In other words, the rules are different for Americans as they can go to the temple straight away. So its made sure that civil weddings are as boring as possible to 'encourage' people to go the temple.

Thank heaven its not like that here. Walking down that aisle with my Dad with everyone I care about smiling at me, looking at my gorgeous husband smiling at me from the end of the aisle was without a doubt the best moment of my entire life! Ill never forget it as long as I live. No woman should be denied that experience, as every girl is dreaming of that moment from when shes about 5 years old!! Mine didnt disappoint. I wish I could do it all over again!!!

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If my wife was LDS, i would have gone to the temple not just because it's the temple, but because the blessing of eternal marriage is had NOWHERE else. you can say whatever vows you want but the only priesthood authority that can "bind things on earth and also in heaven" is that of the MP.

If you can make it to the temple, you should go, if youa re both members of the church, you should have gone to the temple. the church does discourage civil services because of the nature of eternal families. Do not cheapen yourself by thinking you shouldn't be married in the temple.

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I got married in the Stake Center gym, but we had to bring in a judge, because we wanted to have a procession and our own vows. We did not realize that the ring ceremony would have been out too. What a bummer. At least our judge did a really good job, and the decorations were quite nice.

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If my wife was LDS, i would have gone to the temple not just because it's the temple, but because the blessing of eternal marriage is had NOWHERE else. you can say whatever vows you want but the only priesthood authority that can "bind things on earth and also in heaven" is that of the MP.

If you can make it to the temple, you should go, if youa re both members of the church, you should have gone to the temple. the church does discourage civil services because of the nature of eternal families. Do not cheapen yourself by thinking you shouldn't be married in the temple.

Hi MadHatter,

If you are refering to Aphrodite, she did get married in the Temple but because she lives in the UK, marriage laws are different. She had a lovely Civil ceremony and then later in the day (I believe) she and her husband were sealed in the Temple.

M. :)

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<div class='quotemain'>

If my wife was LDS, i would have gone to the temple not just because it's the temple, but because the blessing of eternal marriage is had NOWHERE else. you can say whatever vows you want but the only priesthood authority that can "bind things on earth and also in heaven" is that of the MP.

If you can make it to the temple, you should go, if youa re both members of the church, you should have gone to the temple. the church does discourage civil services because of the nature of eternal families. Do not cheapen yourself by thinking you shouldn't be married in the temple.

Hi MadHatter,

If you are refering to Aphrodite, she did get married in the Temple but because she lives in the UK, marriage laws are different. She had a lovely Civil ceremony and then later in the day (I believe) she and her husband were sealed in the Temple.

M. :)

you are correct....works like that in other countries too.

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Well I hope that most LDS wedding ceremonies go as well as Mad Hatter's!

Most LDS wedding ceremonies are done as a sacred ordinance in the Holy Temple of the Lord where husband and wife are married for time and all eternity. The covenants they make with each other and the Lord are sacred and beautiful. The promises given by the Lord are awe inspiring and beautiful.

I've was married in a civil ceremony with all the pomp and circumstance and flowers and special music and wonderful vows, etc.....it was nice but it does not compare to being married forever in the Temple of the Lord!

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I have been to both LDS and non-LDS weddings. They were nice, but there was no spirit in them. And I'm not saying that because I'm a member, etc. There is a spirit of sealing that is part of the temple ceremony that cannot be denied. It is simple, it is unpretentious, and it is forever. I have watched people spend 10s of 1000s of dollars for the perfect day, and like I said, it was nice, but all I could think was 'where is the spirit'?

My daughter's temple wedding was absolutely wonderful. The spirit there was great, and we all knew it was forever...

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What is it about Mormonism that mandates civil ceremonies should stink?

1. Did the Bishop overcharge?

2. Did the Bride or Groom complain?

3. Were the Bride and Groom any "less" married at the end of the ceremony than they would have been if you had run the wedding?

If you answer no to all these questions, then it seems to me that something must have been done right.

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Lds Civil Wedding Ceremonies Are Lame.

My wife wasn't member at the time. We had a lovely wedding on a yatch in Newport Harbor right in front of John Wayne's old home. Not lame and a good time was had by all.

Basket-ball in the morning...

Dancing and marriage in the afternoon...

That was a good day; perhaps the best of days.

I took a jab at the Bishop during the luncheon. I said: "Great ceremony, almost like a real Priest." Not as a slam about his authority, but about his performance.

Did you also call his wife a sleazebag and his children dumb mutts? That would have been just the little je ne sais pas to make is a truly classy move.

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My comment was aimed at asking if every LDS ceremony outside of the temple was as bad as the one I witnessed this past weekend.

It seems that it is not.

I still question the policy highlighted in bold from my the CHI in my OP. What purpose does downplaying a non-temple wedding serve?

Did you also call his wife a sleazebag and his children dumb mutts? That would have been just the little je ne sais pas to make is a truly classy move.

No, she wasn't sleazy, and his kids weren't there (probably to avoid giving them the wrong impression that a non-temple wedding still counts).

If nothing more comes from my jab, I hope he spends more than five minutes in preparation the next time he is to give a "civil" wedding ceremony.

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by my bishop. he did the ring ceremony

I'm confused. I thought the bishop did not do a ring ceremony. Have I misunderstood?

the only restrictions there were to the wedding was no filming or takign pictures during the actual ceremony itself, but everything was fine, you coudl also aduio-record the ceremony if you like, but no video taping or pictures. Which is understandable.

Why couldn't there be film or video in the Relief Society room? The CHI Jason posted only say in the Chapel. Perhaps that's been updated?

I attended my MIL's wedding in the Relief Society room 17 years ago and they took pictures.

Thanks for any clarifications you can offer.

Elphaba

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In England, a Temple sealing is not seen as legal partnership so anyone being married in England has to have a civil ceremony first. In Scotland a Temple marriage would be recognised as on equal footing as a civil marriage, except we don't actually have a Temple in Scotland.

When me and my wife got married, we had to have a civil ceremony before we could go get sealed. Our wedding was nice, we had to bend our Branch President's will a bit so we could have a full ring exchange ceremony (he was only willing to have me give her a ring, not her to me as well). We had some lovely flower arrangements done by our next door neighbour (a member), and the cake was done by my wife's best friend (not a member). It was a simple ceremony, but it was certainly not lame.

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If you are refering to Aphrodite, she did get married in the Temple but because she lives in the UK, marriage laws are different. She had a lovely Civil ceremony and then later in the day (I believe) she and her husband were sealed in the Temple.

M.

Thanks for clarifying that M :)

My wedding was very spiritual. Everyone said for weeks afterwards the love and the spirit that was present at our wedding. So many people were crying including me and my husband. Even my non member friends said it was unlike any other wedding they had been to before. A civil wedding does not mean the wedding is devoid of spirit and emotion. It was the most spiritual experience in my life that everyone could share in, which a temple marriage does not allow. It seems different bishops have different rules which seems unfair to me. What one could have, another can not.

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My wife and I were married in 1954 by our Baptist preacher, with her sister and another couple attending. Very simple. We had three small children when the missionaries first called on us in the early 1960s. We joined the LDS Church in 1963. In 1966 we drove about 2000 miles to reach a LDS Temple.

We received our endowments and our marriage was sealed. Our three little angels, all dresses in white, were brought in by the temple workers and sealed to my wife and I. That day concluded what we had been working toward for three years.

That was 41 years ago. We have been married for 53 years, and grand kids, and great grand kids, have been added. Now we have a temple only 80 miles from our house. My wife and I attend often. We are still doing proxy work for ancestors that we research.

I'm saying this for those here who don't understand what eternal marriage is, and for those who don't seem to treasure it. We are living in a time that the prophets only dreamed of. The Priesthood is among the people again. The saving ordinances have been restored and are available in our day in the Temples.

The stone has been cut from the mountian without hands, and has began rolling forth to fill all the earth. The building of Temples has just begun, and it will continue. The days that Isaiah saw are begining and will continue throughout the 1000 years of peace that will soon start.

"And it shall come to pass in the last days, that the mountain of the LORD's house shall be established in the top of the mountains, and shall be exalted above the hills; and all nations shall flow unto it. And many people shall go and say, Come ye, and let us go up to the mountain of the LORD, to the house of the God of Jacob; and he will teach us of his ways, and we will walk in his paths: for out of Zion shall go forth the law, and the word of the LORD from Jerusalem".

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If you are refering to Aphrodite, she did get married in the Temple but because she lives in the UK, marriage laws are different. She had a lovely Civil ceremony and then later in the day (I believe) she and her husband were sealed in the Temple.

M.

Thanks for clarifying that M :)

My wedding was very spiritual. Everyone said for weeks afterwards the love and the spirit that was present at our wedding. So many people were crying including me and my husband. Even my non member friends said it was unlike any other wedding they had been to before. A civil wedding does not mean the wedding is devoid of spirit and emotion. It was the most spiritual experience in my life that everyone could share in, which a temple marriage does not allow. It seems different bishops have different rules which seems unfair to me. What one could have, another can not.

My parents, who are English & Scottish respectively, were married civilly, then they had to wait a week before they could go to the Temple, so they celebrate 2 anniversaries.
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I'm saying this for those here who don't understand what eternal marriage is, and for those who don't seem to treasure it. We are living in a time that the prophets only dreamed of. The Priesthood is among the people again. The saving ordinances have been restored and are available in our day in the Temples.

The stone has been cut from the mountian without hands, and has began rolling forth to fill all the earth. The building of Temples has just begun, and it will continue. The days that Isaiah saw are begining and will continue throughout the 1000 years of peace that will soon start.

I suggest that those in this forum who have found various things that you disagree with concerning the Temples to try to understand what is happening. Are you like one of the five wise virgins who's lamps are full of oil and are prepared for when the Bridegroom willl come, or are you like one of the five foolish virgins who have used up the oil in you lamps and your lamps have ceased to provide light?

If I might, the Priesthood has never been removed from the earth at any time. And while your temple ceremonies bring you spiritual blessings, they are not necessary for anyone's exaltation.

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