Tamiele

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About Tamiele

  • Birthday 01/09/1970

Profile Information

  • Gender
    Female
  • Location
    Alberta
  • Religion
    LDS

Tamiele's Achievements

  1. It has taken me some time to get back on the board and to read these replies. Firstly, thanks to all for taking the time to give me their insights. I have watched Heavenly Father guide me through cleaning up so much of my life - I can see it plain as day how different areas and weeknesses have been resolved by prayer and effort and the help of the Lord. I sometimes think that this feels like that last BIG issue that needs to be resolved. Old beliefs and negative thinking have taken deep root in me and that is why I need more than simply accepting the challenge and working it out. I have tried that and fell apart. I need to get some counselling/therapy to work on those beliefs and change them. Darn it - I want to rid myself of this and step into the sunshine. To take on whatever life wants to give me. I will follow up on your suggestions, and thank you!! The retreat idea was something I thought would be helpful to pack up and go somewhere for a few days with group therapy and other kinds of work and give a concentrated effort - without interruption to this problem. Lots of retreats out there but I want to be able to speak freely about my faith and also that many of my fears are at church - I don't want someone saying to me that maybe my faith is the problem. That is not negotiable. Thanks again for your comments.
  2. Hi I don't post often but I am glad for a place to post my concerns and hear from a knowledgable base of folks. A small bit of history on me. I am a convert of 11 years. 11 years ago I had my first child, moved to a new city/province and got married. My husband is a lifetime member who was inactive when I met him. Glad he took a chance on me and glad he introduced me to the church. We have 2 kids together. One has some special needs. I have been inspired to homeschool them and so far both kids are really doing wonderfully. I am having trouble integrating myself into the church culture. I am always feeling like I can't contribute anything given that I haven't been brought up in the church and don'thave this life time of scripture study so I feel inadequate. It stops me from doing ALOT in the church. I accept callings that let me do background help, not anything that puts me infront of people. My question is - I am doing what I can with reading materials to help me grow through these debilitating beliefs, I also wondered if there was a program/retreat/workshop that I could attend that is put on by someone in the church that I would attend to work this out. I am in Alberta but I could travel, within reason. Any suggestions??
  3. I have this song on sheet music. The kids are supposed to learn it for a stake primary choir. Does anyone know if instrumental or choir version exists on the internet that I could download and she could practice singing with I can play it a bit but she has a karaoke machine and I thought if the music existed somewhere I could get a copy and she could sing along so she could practice before they meet for practices. She is 9 and I like to help her learn her music a bit before hand. Thanks!!
  4. I think John wrote some good music and I feel he definitely has a place in history. I don't think he was a perfect human being but none of us are. I didn't realize that Elton John's song Empty Garden was a tribute to John. I always liked that song....YouTube - Elton John - Empty Garden
  5. Had a visit from my visiting teachers today and they mentioned that you can have your home blessed/dedicated and by doing that it can help keep Satan out. I hadn't ever heard of such a thing and am going to mention this to my husband when he gets home tonight from work. I am a convert and still learning about a lot of things. Since I have days when I feel a heaviness bearing down on me - and it doesn't make any sense since I am doing things that I know to be right and living the Gospel as best as I can. They suggested this might help. Anyhow, I wanted to know if this is an official process or more like a blessing whereby my husband will just speak what words he feels prompted to say?? Thanks to anyone who can comment.
  6. Thanks for the many encouraging and helpful remarks. I do have some idea of what I am contributing. One of which - is the fact that I am one of the few people in the ward who is homeschooling. Not by choice - by necessity and have been doing that for 5 years now. I am not always met with understanding - and a couple times with outright animosity. This is likely what caused me difficulty last night. One older lady was peppering me with questions and when I didn't answer with what she wanted to hear - she challenged me on it. Sometimes I want to scream at some church members who forget that I am the only one with the authority to make decisions for my children's welfare - not another mom who thinks they know what is best based on their experiences. Mine are different. I didn't even both to get into the fact that my son in special needs because she had closed her mind off to my point of view. Anyhow, back to what I contribute - some sisters who may have considered homeschooling or even had some backward biases towards it - may now look at me and think, she is doing it, perhaps it isn't that weird - or in the case of one of the sisters - she actually pulled her child last year who was having trouble in school and I think she felt she could do that because others were doing it too. I also thought to myself, that when I am in a group of people and feeling like an outsider. I could make it my mission to interact with people so others don't feel like I do. Plain and simple. Stop thinking about myself - and think of how to help the other sisters. Thanks again for all of your helpful advice.
  7. I have never had this done. I don't know why. I always say I will get to it and just don't make the time. I agree, it would likely clear up some issues for me.
  8. feelings of being out of place. I have always felt out of place in the LDS church. I have been a member since 2000. I haven't always been active - and adjusting to the culture of the church has been hard for me. Alot of things want to push me out of my comfort zone. Growing up in another church and in another community kind of makes me feel like I have no roots with the people of the church. My husband is a member and his family as well. I have always done well in my own circle of friends/relatives and can take the lead and get things done, without too much anxiety. But not with church people I can't figure out exactly why that is. Tonight I really felt it to my core - I have been called to be an assistant to the Enrichment activities and went to help out. People I knew well and people I didn't know at all were there. I felt like I had absolutely nothing to offer. Everybody had a skill or talent - I kept thinking I haven't anything. I am not the domestic diva that many LDS women have cultivated those skills. Where can I fit here?? Is this adversary?? I obviously have an incorrect belief hidden somewhere deep inside that is bringing this out in the open for me. I am terrified to get infront to give the opening prayers, I refuse when asked. I won't bear my testimony, or give talks, or anything that puts me infront of the group. I don't understand why. I have been infront of people in other situations to sing or announce something. I just though perhaps someone else might have this same issue. I want to be over this. I want to serve and give my best and I know I have things to offer if I just thought about it. I just need to stop feeling ill at the thought of a social gathering. Just be a friend.
  9. I had a 6 month old boy and needed to feed him so some kindly people showed me to the nurses lounge. It wasn't long before I had some company and one of the women came in with her boy to nurse as well. She likely could tell I was not a member - white pantsuit without sleeves kinda gave me away. She starts chatting me up. She finds out I had moved from Saskatchewan earlier that year. She then says to me, "isn't Saskatchewan all one state?"....and this coupled with hearing the word "primary" (and I am thinking US election reference) mentioned in the first part of the Sacrament meeting I had been in - thinking to myself , are all of these mormons from US and not very bright?? So I say " Saskatchewan is a province, not a state!!" Of course, she meant Stake, but what did I know ?? Bet that Sister hasn't forgotten me!! That was 10 years ago.
  10. How to get a calling? Try this.... Slip into the back of the church and sit by yourself. Wear dark glasses and avoid eye contact with other members. Speak to no one!! Leave hastily during the closing hymn and bolt for the door. Worked for me!!!
  11. This reminds me of an incident we experienced about 11 years ago. My boyfriend at the time was planning to rent a room temporarily with his uncle and wife. They were members of the church. I wasn't a member at that point. New very little about it. Anyhow, my boyfriend and I were having a baby. We were engaged to be married. He was paying uncle $500 for rent. We were floored the first time I was going to come for a visit, they wouldn't allow me to stay there because we weren't married. I find out years later that these two actually lived in the same house before their own temple marriage. Still bugs me!!!! Well, we are all now married and have been sealed in the Temple but I always thought that that was not right on their part. Maybe others would sympathize with them but it was definitely awkward.
  12. I agree with Food Network and HGTV. I have learned tons of things from those channels. Even my kids get drawn into those shows - good stuff!!
  13. I am trying to clean up my entire life and live within the boundaries of the gospel more fully and completely than I have done thus far. One of these things I would love to do, is to limit my TV watching - but instead use it for more timely and appropriate programs that will enrich me rather than expose me to nonsense. Some of the ones I was thinking of are Extreme Makeover: Home Edition, America's Funniest Videos, 19 Kids and Counting, and many classic movies on TCM (just saw Guess Who's Coming To Dinner - fabulous!!). Anyways, do any of you have favorites that might fit into that category that you could suggest?? Thanks!!
  14. I always say bye, and have so far encountered only people who also say it. I have watched movies/tv where they just hang up the phones - and I am always bothered by it.
  15. I have not read through this thread yet but wanted to add my own. Hope it doesn't duplicate. Anyhow, I hate people who stand in a long line up for fast food, and only when they are actually up to the counter, and they are asked what would they like, do they decide to LOOK at the menu and decide what to order. The menu that has been visible to them the entire time they were in the line up. That one really boils my blood!!