Anonymouse

I believe that I don't need them. In fact, I hardly notice a difference now, except that I don't fall asleep in classes. I've gotten A's in all of my classes basically my whole life (Except for basketball and writing; both of those teachers promised me A's, but then they backed down on their promises). I need medication because I can't pay attention auditorily, unless it is very interesting. Visually, I am nearly photographic, as long as I am paying attention. I am very sure that I will have enough motivation to pay attention on a mission. There is enough variety to keep it interesting. The question is will they look at ADHD and automatically restrict certain missions regardless of medication? I know I shouldn't do this... but would it be dishonest to say that I never had ADHD? I wasn't exactly "diagnosed" with ADHD. The doctor said I "probably" had it, so he gave me medication. Paying attention is a weakness, but not a disease. On a mission, there aren't distractions. You study the Scriptures and teach; there aren't computers, YouTube, video games. So... No, I don't believe I will take medication. My psychologist thinks all medications do is mask the real problem. He thinks he can teach me to live without them. What do you guys think? Wow, reading back through this message I wrote, I sound like a stuck-up little kid. Sorry about that.

First of all, not everyone, even in what we profess is the only true church is perfect. Some are quick to judgement, as many have been towards you. Please be patient with them. I believe that you are misinterpreting some of our beliefs. All people are entitled to personal revelation for themselves, but only one (the prophet) can receive revelation for the entire church. This is because of false prophets who professed to teach for the entire church, but their intent was to destroy the work. Doctrine and Covenants 43 explains this in further detail. If you would like to read it, you can find it here: Doctrine and Covenants 45Â . Particularly read verses 5-7. Hopefully this will be beneficial in your search for the truth. =)

slamjet, Thanks for the advice! Sorry, I should have made it more clear in my post. I take two 10mg pills a day: One at 8am and one at 12am. Typically, Adderall dosed to 3 times a day, but for whatever reason, my doctor one prescribed two. Everything logically is right and good with Adderall, but something feels wrong. My head says yes, but my heart says no. For some reason I want to get off Adderall, perhaps because of the mission scenario I described in my previous post. Whatever it is, the feeling is subconscious.

Brigham Young. Does anyone know if serving a mission in a foreign country is allowed if one has ADHD or is taking Adderall? If this places any restrictions on where the Lord might want me to serve, I want to get off the medication ASAP. It is not worth it. Side effects so far... none? Some jitters, maybe. But everything about this seems positive.

Wow... Completely different then expected. I could tell you all the things that are different, but it would take forever. Instead I will tell you at least a couple of examples. I took a 5mg pill on Saturday afternoon, couldn't really tell whether the effect was placebo or not, as there were no side effects or anything. My mind felt like it took all of my cluttered and confused thoughts and filed them in neat spaces. The end result was that my room was cleaned nearly instantly, and my shower took about half the normal time as usual due to a lack of daydreaming. I don't think I stared off into space at all during those hours. I played a couple of video games with my old friends, and I actually did much, much better than I used to, even though I haven't played those games in forever. After another 5mg pill this morning, I think I listened to my first entire sacrament meeting talk... ever. I upped the dosage to 10mgs, as allowed by my doctor because drugs wore off so quickly (it felt like it was gone after 3 hours). I didn't feel a whole lot of difference, but I still think the drug wore off after 3 hours because I started getting very distracted again and staring off into space while reading D&C. If there were any doubts in my mind that I had ADHD, they are gone. The ability to focus for extended lengths while on Adderral shows me the obvious difference from when I was not on the drug. My only concern is that it feels like I am cheating the system. Everyone else struggles and tries so hard in their classes; that is how it was for me. Now it feels like college is going to be the biggest breeze in the world. Why do I deserve what could have been their grades in curved classes and alike? I think I will ask my doctor for a XR (extended release) so that the effect is more even throughout the day and because it wears off so quickly due to high metabolism, in all probability. Right now I am completely off Adderall since it is nearly night time. Luckily I am not really worried about school and everything, because that filing cabinet of tasks that my brain created is still intact, and I know that I can reassess my tasks tomorrow when I am back on Adderall. Case solved? Maybe. Outlook is good. I'll have to try Adderall in a real school lecture tomorrow. It feels like life just got approximately 30 times easier.

Sorry that I am joining this conversion very late... I couldn't read everything in this thread leading up to this, so the following may be out of place. As far as I know, it has been said by presiding officers of the church that only habitual sins that you cannot stop and repent of by yourself and other serious sins (murder, sexual relations outside of marriage, etc.) need to be confessed to the bishop. I believe an apostle said that same thing even for pornography. If it is a one time slip... then you can repent of the sin yourself. If you find yourself with a subsequent addiction to it, then a confession to the bishop must be made. I don't have specific dates, locations, or names for these quotes. These are just things I remember.

Thanks once again for the wonderful responses. The psychiatrist gave me two weeks worth of Adderall to see if there is any beneficial effect. I will take my first pill in the morning. I actually do keep a whiteboard full of tasks. It doesn't help much because I can't drum up the focus to do them until the pressure of a due date sets in. We will see what happens tomorrow. This is a great idea. I actually just had a lesson on this in my D&C religion class. Journals have also been way to hard for me to keep track of. I will set a time aside to write in it. If I have a set time, maybe that will work. Anyway, I will respond back to you all tomorrow and let you know how it goes. Wish me luck!

Thank you for all the wonderful, uplifting comments. All of you are eloquent writers who can touch people's hearts, such as mine. I love the internet... you can be completely honest, and aren't any downsides... none (at least none that I know of). As for ADHD, I'm going to the psychiatrist tomorrow. We will see how it goes. I've already taken quite a few tests, exams, and other things. I've tested positive with "Moderate to Mild" attention deficits, but they won't give me any treatment (whatever it may be) for ADHD because they think my emotions may be causing my attention deficit. Personally, I thought it was the other way. ADHD causes anxiety and depression. I get depressed because it seems like my plate is always full of things to do - I just don't remember what they are. I get anxious for the same reason. Remembering things gets harder and harder for me. I used to live with parents, then I used to have a roommate. Now that he is gone, thinking, remembering, and paying attention is up to my brain alone, which is a near impossible. So while my mental health is under control... how about my spiritual welfare? How can I gain a testimony? How do I feel the spirit? I cannot live by simply faith alone, as it is quickly turning to hope. Those are not the same things.

It doesn't help that the Church now accepts the use of "Mormon" and use the website Mormon.org for investigators. No distancing us from the name now...

I recently received my patriarchal blessing! It started with the sentence: "The Lord is well pleased with you" How is this possible? I rarely say prayers. They are impossible to remember even when I use the "prayer rock" because I will just lose the prayer rock. I read the scriptures twice a week for about 1 hour each time, but only because I have to for a class. I would forget otherwise. I have done the masturbation thing. I did it mostly because it is the only way to fall asleep sometimes. Didn't realize that it was such a bad thing (though I knew it was a sin, as I read the pamphlet they give you on that topic) until reading some posts on this forum. I pray for forgiveness each time (which is actually why I say prayers most of the time, oh the irony). I also have never talked to a bishop about it, but my bishop has mentioned that everyone (male) has experimented with that kind of thing, and that if I ever have a problem with it and can't stop to meet with him. I don't feel that it has ever been a big enough problem to warrant a meeting with the bishop. I also can never get to bed. Time disappears... literally. I sleep about 5-6 hours at night and 1 hour in classes and work during the day. I am currently being diagnosed with ADHD and am battling depression and anxiety disorders at the same time. My religion professor has taught that God possibly gives consideration to those with mental disorders, which would explain why my patriarchal blessing was so positive. The other scenario is that my patriarchal blessing was not divinely received. I am struggling with a testimony right now, so this could easily be a possibility. Then I compare my woes and worries to those suffering in Japan right now. Why am I not grateful for what I have? I am not starving, I am not dieing, I am not dead, I am not in pain, I am not out of money, out of home, out of gas. Why do I have the right to complain? I don't. Does anyone have a suggestion regarding ANY of this things, especially with gaining a testimony??? I have tried so many things that have failed. Life is miserable... but still worth living, as always. If you read through this entire post, sorry for making your life a little bit more gloomy then it was 5 minutes ago. Just remember that behind all the smiling faces you see and meet, there are people like me... who are struggling and confused. Because I guarantee, if you saw me in real life, you would see me smiling.