Dreams_Of_Deutschland

I had to reply based on my experiences. CAUTION: your sense of having been offended may not tolerate my sense of humor! After two failed marriages to American women, I met and married a European lady who is the ultimate match for me: Our sense of humor leaves us in stitches when we joke, we talk far too late into the night about everything, we love each other's family, and one another's children. I could not imagine being married to another selfish, spoiled, lazy, boring American princess who thinks she is the gold plated version of Woman. My lady is the perfect mix of independence, career driven, homemaker, she possesses beauty, brains, personality, fun, confidence, intuition, and intelligence. The real funny part of this is, the most bigoted man on the planet (my father) asked me during our engagement "does it have to be a foreign woman?" We laugh about his comment to this day, and he thinks she placed the moon in the sky. Pray, study, date, observe, and then make the plunge. Your life will never be the same.

Granted, its not meant to restrict dinners any more than the policy of only eating with members when a potential new convert is present. What is plain after seeing the variety of responses, is a lack of standardization throughout this line of business in the church. And yes, the church IS run like a corporation, which usually suffers from a lack of standardization.

This is how it should be... We have (had) a similar unwritten policy with the missionaries. "Stop by for water, a warm-up, a cup of hot chocolate, or dinner any time!"

Agreed...in most cases, there is not the possibility to get everything done between 5 and 6. I do know the Missionary Handbook recommends that dinner should be finished by 6pm, but there is also the caveat in the front of the handbook about the mission president making adjustments for local circumstances. It's not that the missionaries will starve, but it seems to be policy that will automatically trim the amount of invites and time spent in member homes. Not sure how that is a good thing. In my ward, there are nearly 500 members, but only about 150 are active...seems we need to fix the holes in the bucket rather than worry about filling the bucket...

We have always considered having the missionaries in our home as a blessing. Their presence invites the spirituality we enjoy, it helps them cope with being away from home, gives them a family setting, and their messages always bring out good discussions on the Gospel. Enter a new missionary president who suddenly decides that the missionaries can only eat at members homes on Mon/ Wed/ Fri. Strange, but okay- we comply. Two months later (now) the directive comes down that missionary dinners must start at 5pm and end at 6pm. How exactly is this supposed to work out with most people not leaving the workplace until 5pm, then facing a commute of some length? I don't think everyone has a stay at home wife who can prepare dinner for 5 pm (who eats that early, anyhow?) and be there to greet the missionaries. The Elders and Sisters assigned to our ward tell us its a directive from the First Presidency, not the mission president. Meanwhile, 3 states away, my father's ward is being pressured to feed the missionaries, any time, any place, and in any way practical. What gives?

horrible format...and I lost all my profile settings from previous. Nice.

None of those beverages are against the Word of Wisdom. Those ideas are the result of Molly Mormon and Peter Priesthood deciding they could be more holy if they over reached on this issue.

Awww, how clever of you!

While this has turned into a thread about education subsidies, I would like to question why there is not the transparency with church funds that should be there? Joseph Smith (and certainly the Lord) never intended it to be a secret (sacred). And if it truly is "sacred". why was it not so sacred prior to the 1950's when reporting ceased?

There are a lot of Russian immigrants here, not what you would expect in Seattle...

I would like to see this in print...as well as the fallacy of Coke or Pepsi being against the Word Of Wisdom.

Oh no! Not the coffee! How horrible! Seriously...you are taking this issue over the cliff. Have you read the Word Of Wisdom? Have you read what constituted "hot drinks" in the 1830's? Do you know how far off base you (and most Mormons) are in thinking you cannot consume caffeine? Did you know your sacred cup of hot chocolate could be considered a "hot drink" containing caffeine? Its sad how people have been indoctrinated about these beliefs. And no, he should NOT go see the Bishop over this.

I find this thread particularly interesting as I was once married to a shopping addict. The woman I was married to would involve her parents in the mess. Once, when I pointed out that we could spend NO MORE money for the next 4 days as the mortgage was due before my paycheck, she told her mother I had denied her the ability to buy new towels for the kitchen. The manipulation was so bad that it finally destroyed our marriage, although you can be sure it was always my fault for being so controlling with money. $80,000 of debt paid off and 5 years later, I found an awesome woman who hates to shop, has her own career, and is simply amazing in all other facets. To the OP: it's not worth your emotional, physical, and financial health. She will not change. She will continue to abuse your trust and your love. When you leave is up to your judgement, but I believe you will eventually find it necessary to protect yourself. Document everything, show her financial infidelity, and use it in court to protect yourself when the time comes. Finally, some members answer this post with the urge to be compassionate, forgiving, and Christ-like, whereas those same members will walk away from a husband who views pornography. I have read posts where some women are taking the children and walking out with ZERO chance of reconciliation. It is quite the double standard! Sure, pornography addiction is dangerous to the family and marriage, but to treat it on a different level of severity than financial addiction is simply absurd. It is similar to Molly Mormon pointing out how her neighbor drinking Coke is breaking the Word Of Wisdom while she sips on her hot chocolate and eats a slice of chocolate cake. Both contain caffeine! But I digress...

Having a parent who hails from Utah, as well as having spent several summers there, I felt the need to chime in. Growing up LDS meant I was in a tiny minority in our tiny town. After listening to all the stories about Utah, being around cousins, aunts, uncles, and grandparents from Utah, I had the (mistaken) impression that everyone acted more Christ-like in Utah. What a wake up call I received! I witnessed my aunt and grandmother in physical fights, I listened to cousins relate sexual encounters at the age of 15, and watched relatives conduct dishonest business activities. I am currently in a legal battle with a Utah relative over financial misconduct. So, plain and simple, Utah Mormons are still human, they still act aggressively on the roads, they still lie to make money, and do all the "normal" things the rest of us humans do. Don't get the impression you would be moving to Zion...in my opinion, its not!

Soooo sorry!