My name is Cody, and I was baptized and confirmed a member of the Church back in 2010. However, due to internal pressure from my family I caved and resigned from the Church.
I CAN'T STOP BELIEVING THE TRUTH! I know that the Gospel is true, and I know that the Church is the only true Church upon the face of the whole earth. I know that the Savior lives, and I know that President Monson is His living prophet for the entire world. I KNOW that all of these things are true!
I want to return to the church, but I am embarrassed about my departure, and not to mention in 2011 I made a half hearted attempt to return to the Church, but backed out when I thought about losing my family. (They have been very mean and cruel with this fact from the very beginning....) and I feel that as a young man of 30 years old I aught to have enough fortitude to direct my own life. I somehow feel like less than a man I guess..
I have recently become firm in my resolve to return to the Church when I saw a commercial from the Church and it made my heart "long for the courts of the living God".
Recently, I had a meeting with my entire immediate family. I was respectful, honest, and bared my heart and soul to my family (who believed me to be brainwashed and in fact wanting to belong to a "cult"). I let them know that I intended to repent of my transgression of leaving the Church and that I intended to be an active member of the Church with God's help.
They promised to not disown me, however, they made it clear that my decision was NOT supported and that they wouldn't welcome Missionaries, home teachers, or any other church officials into our home. (I am also a renter with my brother in one of my parent's rental properties)...so until I am able to be totally dependent from them I will have to respect their decisions. My mother actually made the comment that she felt she was just standing by and watching me march to hell.
Anyway....
I wanted to say "Hi" and that I could really use the support of friends, and those of you on this board.
I feel embarrassed because I truly want to live for God! I truly want to belong to the One, True Church upon the face of the whole earth, but I have been unwilling to persevere when faced with being disowned. Dear God, give me the resolve of our early pioneers who faced death for this glorious gospel!
Anyway, please pray for me as I muster the courage to go talk to the Bishop.
Blessings,
-Cody